Is it horrible that I find this weekend’s box office receipts absolutely delicious? I don’t care. It makes me happy. First off, the number one film in America is a family movie called Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs, which took in more than $30 million. Second place went to The Informant!, the Matt Damon dark comedy. It actually did better than expected, which is great for Matt Damon. Third place? The Jennifer Aniston-Aaron Eckhart romantic dramedy Love Happens, which didn’t even break the $9 million mark.
Oh, what’s that? What came in fourth place? Why, a little film called Jennifer’s Body, which didn’t even bust the $7 million mark. Jennifer’s Body was probably the most heavily promoted film opening this past weekend – the studio poured money into advertising, and Megan Fox was giving multiple inane interviews every day for the past three weeks. Jennifer’s Body was considered Megan’s first real test – sure, people like her in Transformers, but will anyone go see her in a film not starring hundreds of millions of dollars in special effects? The answer is “nope”. Entertainment Weekly enjoyed some schadenfreude at Megan’s expense, asking if she’s really a movie star. They ask – “Wouldn’t Megan be better off on television?”
The disappointing box office returns for Jennifer’s Body over the weekend was a contrast to the success with which its star, Megan Fox, commanded every TV show she chose to slink onto while promoting the movie last week. On Live With Regis and Kelly, she shimmied up on one of the hosts’ high stools in a tight dress and beige pumps and let Kelly Ripa talk about how she, Kelly, had spotted stardom in Fox way back when Megan played a ditzy teen on Ripa’s short-lived sitcom Hope and Faith.
On The Tonight Show — the one Conan O’Brien hosts, not the one Jay Leno does — Fox came out in a tight dress and black pumps to say that she loves to eat at chain restaurants like The Olive Garden and Red Lobster, reserving particular praise for the latter restaurant’s cheese biscuits: “You’re the perfect woman!” joked Conan, meaning the perfect geek-fantasy woman: she’s hot-looking, and a cheap date!
Megan Fox sells sex and provocation. On TV and in magazines, it’s fun for an array of people — young and old straight men, girls who detect a dash of riot grrrl in her demeanor, gay men and women who recognize a present-and-future camp idol, if she lasts long enough to attract female impersonators — to relish her wanton kitty-in-stilettos image. She is, in short, great in interviews.
But actually paying a ticket ogle her is another, ah, proposition. Fox attracted a big following in the Transformers movies because moviegoers were paying for the big shiny robot toys and also got a human Barbie doll as an extra added bonus. But it took TV and print interviews for the Barbie doll to establish that she was smart, funny, and self-aware.
Well, aware enough to recognize that Diablo Cody had written her a terrific script in Jennifer’s Body. But (along with all the movie people who green-lit this project) not aware enough to foresee that asking citizens to utter the phrase, “I want to see Jennifer’s Body, please” was going to be sufficiently embarrassing to force a lot of them to opt with the more family-friendly sounding, “I want to see Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs, please.”
For millions of people, I’m guessing, Megan Fox is the very definition of a guilty pleasure. And a guilty pleasure is something you enjoy in the privacy of your own home. You don’t go out, drive to a theater, and ask for a ticket to see Jennifer’s Body if you think the person behind the ticket window knows you’re asking for a ticket to see Megan Fox’s body.
[From Entertainment Weekly]
Box Office Mojo puts the sucky Jennifer’s Body box office on a ad campaign that focused too heavily on appealing to fanboys. They claim more could have been done to appeal to women, but I think that’s off the mark. I think most women view Megan as pretty dumb, and appealing solely to the fanboys. I’m not sure how “Megan Fox, television star” would really have a better time of it. She’s still going to say horrible things, and she’s still going to alienate people. I think if they had aimed the film at a female audience, the box office would have pretty much the same, maybe worse.
UPDATE: I got my numbers from Box Office Mojo, but it looks like they were slightly wrong (or racist?). Tyler Perry’s I Can Do Bad All by Myself came in third place with $10 million. Then fourth place was Love Happens, then Jennifer’s Body in fifth place. The actual numbers for the receipts are the same, just the placement changes.
Photos are stills from Jennifer’s Body, thanks to allmoviephoto
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